Waiting

Last night as I was walking up the hill to my beloved home-sweet-home, Cdub, I started to really think about some things. I was thinking about how hard it is to wait for things and how hard it is to not know exactly what God's will is in a particular situation. So often I say to myself, "If I just knew what God wanted in [insert situation], then I'd be content to wait for it to happen." Or I think, "I wish God would just hurry up and do something about this, that way I wouldn't have to wonder how/when it will happen."


Fortunately, God is not like that. Hold it...did I just say "fortunately" God doesn't do things the way I want them? How can that be true? Well, here's the thing. I'm a finite, insignificant person. God is the infinite, almighty Creator and Sustainer of the universe. Even if I'd like to know how something would turn out, deep down I always know that He knows what He's doing, and His way is best. It's the waiting for things that produces character. It's the not knowing that produces trust and reliance on Him. If He always told us what we asked Him to, or gave us what we wanted, when we wanted it, how would we ever depend on Him? We would depend on Him way less, if at all. I'm so grateful that He knows better than I do, and that His way is better than mine. I'm grateful for this forced dependence and trust, because if it weren't for this, I would totally try to be independent from Him.


Also, I think it's important to realize this: when the Bible talks about God's will, it's not how we talk about God's will. We always talk about it as being, what will my career be? where should I go to college? who should I marry? should I have kids and how many? etc. But I Thessalonians 4:3 says this, "For this is the will of God: your sanctification..." So rather than worrying about God's will in the big things, we just need to obey Him and trust Him in the little things. As we obey His commandments and read His word and continue to love Him more, what He wants becomes what we want, because we know He knows best. That's why I love the quote, "Love God and do what you want." Because if we're truly loving Him as we should, our desires will have become His. 


Here's two quotes that came to mind while thinking about this last night and this morning:

 ...the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able to honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done. - Elisabeth Elliot in Passion and Purity

Waiting on God isn't about the suspension of meaning and purpose. It's part of the meaning and purpose that God has brought into my life. Waiting on God isn't to be viewed as an obstruction in the way of the plan. Waiting is an essential part of the plan. For the child of God, waiting isn't simply about what I'll receive at the end of my wait. No, waiting is much more purposeful, efficient, and practical than that. Waiting is fundamentally about what I'll become as I wait. God is using the wait to do in and through me exactly what He's promised. Through the wait He's changing me. By means of the wait He's altering the fabric of my thoughts and desires. Through the wait He's causing me to see and experience new things about Him and His kingdom. And all of this sharpens me, enabling me to be a more useful tool in His redemptive hands. - Paul Tripp