just so i can stop tweeting everything that comes to mind today

(I might enjoy twitter too much some days. Then other days I forget about it.)

Here are my reject tweets (not because they aren't tweet worthy - let's be honest, I'm hilarious and everything I think about is tweet worthy...ok not really but still - but because I don't want my followers to get sick of me:

*I really wish my left foot would stop giving me trouble!*

*I can't WAIT to see my awana kids tomorrow night - Justin, Ansley, Silas, and Ellyse are some of my favorite people ever*

*Also - whoever thought of "bring a snack night" for awana is my new BFF*

*I'm excited to get together with a bunch of friends tonight to celebrate Lindsay's birthday*

*Everything I wrote about in my "Struggles" post on my (other) blog yesterday...yep...still difficult*

*Too much school, not enough words with friends.*

*I Peter is blowing my mind. I have completely read/listened to it three times today. So thankful for my Principles of Personal Bible Study Class*

*"The dying thief rejoiced to see that fountain in his day; and there my I, though vile as he, wash all my sins away"*

Would love to hear this in concert.

(Also, this is an adorable picture)

Laurel and I talked about going...but I'm not sure if there are tickets available still.

sigh.

So, the first week of the SP12 semester is coming to a close. So far, I have been to 4 of my 5 classes, and am psyched for the semester. I can't remember the last time I had so few classes. But it's a good thing I only have 14 units, because Children's Lit just might kill me. Tonight I have my OT II class with Abner Chou, and since I had the first half of the class last semester, I pretty much know what to expect from it.

Last night was my reunion with my awana kids! It was so much fun. Our group was minus one, which was sad. But it was so exciting to see all the kids in my group again, as well as the other kids (one who would not stop hugging me...probably because it was so cold during game time, but I'd like to think she missed me). I just love those kids so much and am already looking forward to next week! After awana I hung out with my friend Bekah (who I used to TA for in the Biblical Counseling dept my freshman year). She's leaving next week to go to Uganda for a year! I will miss her very much! I have spent so much time in her office, whether it was for work (freshman year), to chat, to get advice, to eat her candy (in an "antidepressants" bottle), or to just hang out. I already miss visiting her office almost daily. But it was good to have a chance to finally make cake pops together after we'd talked about it so long. It was sad to say goodbye but I am SO excited for her and for the work that God is going to do in and through her.

After that, I came back home (to the Brooks' house, in case you haven't heard that I'm living here this semester) and summarized the Bible in one page (well...plus a little extra). I have never had an assignment like that...it was pretty awesome!! That and other assignments are why I'm looking forward to Principles of Personal Bible Study. It was a last minute decision to take the class, and I've already learned so much in the two class periods we had. Today, Betty Price (our sweet professor) gave us a personal email (with parts made up) she had received and asked us to write down everything we could find in categories such as "about the author(s)", "about the recipient", and "cultural issues". After discussing that, she gave us our new task: doing the exact same thing with the book of Philemon. It's crazy how much you can get from a book by studying it that way. Needless to say..this class is awesome and I'm excited.

Tomorrow is dorm chapel. This is my first dorm chapel ever that won't be in cdub. Now I'll be with the off campus students...it's a little strange to think about. This is definitely a different season for me. But different is definitely not bad! While I do miss being in the dorm and the convenience of being surrounded by so many of my friends, it's been so much fun living here!

War Horse

Last night I went with my favorite newlyweds to see War Horse. I would just love to tell you all about the movie...but you need to see it for yourself! It was an incredible story, full of both intensity and humor. It was pretty long, and Sam thought that it was slow at the beginning, but we all really enjoyed it overall. GO SEE IT. There are parts that still get to me! I have come to realize in the past month that I don't have what it takes to see war movies - Laurel and I tried to watch Saving Private Ryan and couldn't bear more than five minutes - but this one had more than just battle scenes. I mean, the movie's about a horse. All I wanted to do was give him a hug...he's such a beautiful animal. Anyway...go see it.

Oh, I almost forgot to say this. One of the characters in the movie looked really familiar, and I couldn't figure out why. Then I realized he looked just like the son of a family friend, who's currently my favorite Navy recruit (also, the only one I know). So when that character was shown in battle about halfway into the movie, I could barely handle it!! Thankfully this character survived. :) Just a fun fact I thought I'd share with you...also telling you a little reason it was maybe extra intense for me.

You Know You're a Nerd When...

You know you're a nerd when your favorite iPhone game (besides any and all word games) is multiplayer solitaire. You also know you're a nerd when you can't stop playing it.

randoms.

As I sit here in the airport during my layover, all I really want is to take a nap. And maybe a travel companion so that I could leave my things where they are and leave to go throw away my trash. I have this thing with trash...when I'm done with something, I want the container/wrapper gone, stat. I don't know why...I've just been this way for years. Also, this is the only reason I want a travel buddy...I hate getting settled during a layover and then wanting dinner or needing to use the restroom, and having to choose between packing up all my stuff then possibly losing my seat and holding it/ not eating. Not a fun choice! I'm always sore after traveling. I know I'll definitely be sore tomorrow, but only part of it from traveling today. The other part will come from my current soreness, which is from shoveling yesterday. Used my back way too much, and didn't use my legs enough. You live and you learn (thank you Alanis Morissette).

I hate leaving Maine. I hate leaving Sacramento too. It's always bittersweet. Living on opposite coasts is quite fun, but it is also painful at times. Saying goodbye to my Maine family is never easy. Especially these days, when I don't know the next time I'll be back. But such is life when you're twenty-one years old and a junior in college.

Speaking of college, break is almost over. As you may have read in my previous posts, I'm not exactly excited for that to happen. Right now so much is up in the air and I'm having to lean hard on my faith in God. Which is never a bad thing!! It's just not easy peasy. Simple, not easy. But in all honestly I do look forward to Truth and Life conference and seeing my friends. Just not school. Not yet. Thankfully I have a bit over a week before that starts again, and maybe I'll be ready. But right now, I feel like I'm still recovering from last semester. It was brutal. It was hard academically but it was also hard spiritually and emotionally. But I have learned so much and if I could go back and ease the pain, I wouldn't. Because pain causes growth. I've mentioned before that when God refines us, He does so by fire. When you're put through the fire, it burns. But you come out more like Christ and it's all worth it! I know all of this and am so thankful for the opportunities to grow last semester. I'm just not super stoked about going back and possibly going through all of that again. Which is pretty wimpy of me, I suppose.

Last night I had a mini freak out session. Things that shouldn't have bothered me so much, did. I don't know why, other than the fact that my heart is desperately wicked (Jeremiah 17:9). But I thankfully took out my journal and wrote down some thoughts as I calmed down and reflected on Christ and His work that paid the price for my sin (including my anger at the time). I realized something last night (for probably the 2837257th time) - self-love hurts self the most! When we're focused on ourselves, things will hurt that shouldn't. So we wind up hurting ourselves more than necessary by trying to eliminate our pain. Tozer said it this way - "The labor of self-love is a heavy one indeed...the heart's fierce effort to protect itself from every slight, to shield its touchy honor from the bad opinion of friend and enemy, will never let the mind have rest." When you focus on God and His character, the offenses of others mean considerably less. It's like the song says, "Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace."

This is such a random collection of thoughts but it's just what's been on my mind. :) Now I must go, because it's time to pack up my stuff and wander around the airport a little bit more. Maybe I'll just walk around until my plane boards, that way it doesn't matter if my seat gets taken. Anyway, have a great day!

How Deep the Father's Love for Us

How deep the Father's love for us, how vast beyond all measure, that He should give His only Son to make a wretch His treasure.
How great the pain of searing loss - the Father turns His face away as wounds which mar the chosen One bring many sons to glory.

Behold the Man upon the cross - my sin upon His shoulders. Ashamed I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers.
It was my sin that held Him there until it was accomplished.
His dying breath has brought me life; I know that it is finished.

I will not boast in anything, no gifts, no power, no wisdom; but I will boast in Jesus Christ, His death and resurrection.
Why should I gain from His reward? I cannot give an answer. But this I know with all my heart - His wounds have paid my ransom.

Words by Stuart Townend.

yay.

So I finally am fully on Maine time! It took me forever...my stomach adjusted quickly, and I was able to fall asleep at a normal time every night. But until this morning, I kept waking up way later than I would plan to. I was sleeping in until 9:30 or 10 in the mornings and even then, it was a struggle to fully wake up. What? This coming from the girl who can't sleep until 7:30 when she's at school? Crazy talk. Except that waking up at 9:30 or 10 in Maine is like waking up at 6:30 or 7 in California. Anyways...this morning I woke up at 8, which is much more normal (for vacation). I've just always been a morning person. Maybe not always the nicest person in the morning, but I usually wake up pretty easily. For years, I struggled against that - all my friends and sisters have no problems sleeping in, so why can't I? I would try and fail. But from pretty much the very beginning of the semester, I decided to stop struggling against it and just wake up earlier and go to sleep earlier. Guess what? I was rarely tired like I have been in the past, and I did better in my classes. Crazy how God wires you to be a certain way, and when you function as you're wired to, you are at your best!! (Crazy was sarcastic. It totally makes sense.)

Anyway, now that I'm totally on Maine time, I can enjoy it for a couple days, because I leave Friday and then I'll have to adjust back. C'est la vie.

Listen. Behold Our God. Sovereign Grace Music.

Just some more random thoughts (lots of these lately):

Buying new music is so much fun. I just adore it...the options are virtually endless. The bummer is that most of the music I like is $1.29. But to make up for the sting of that, some good songs can be found for $.69. So it's an almost fair trade. Almost. Also, I could spend all my money on Selah's music...beautiful, beautiful. But then I'd miss out on Lady A, Sovereign Grace, and others.

On a related note..Josh Turner can hit those low notes like nobody's business. Swoon.


Going to make red velvet cupcakes tonight (or maybe tomorrow). This is very nerve-wracking, because the first time I stayed with the Brooks family, Courtney and I decided to make some from scratch. Obviously, if I'm posting about it almost two years later, it was a less than successful trial. Anyway, I got a red velvet cupcake + frosting kit for Christmas...so it's time to redeem myself fully (though Courtney and I made killer r.v. cake balls, it won't be fully over until I make actual cupcakes..even though these are from a package, it'll do...anything to get that fiasco off my back once and for all!)

Dinner tonight: lasagna and bread. With all of fun (minus Abby)! I am so excited! Let me tell you about my thing with lasagna...I love it. I used to request it every year on my birthday, and would always follow it with my other love, cheesecake. If you don't believe that I adore cheesecake, ask Meredith. I maybe once literally jumped at the offer. Maybe.

Words with Friends is too addicting. Seriously. But you know what I play more than that? Solitaire. I'm such a boring person.

Also..what's up with the Bachelor? Last week Monica seemed like the biggest drama starter..but this week she seemed...nice? And Courtney and Blakeley...yeah they need to go. The first date was, of course, adorable. It's almost always my favorite date of the whole season.

Just found out...my brother doesn't get a cell phone until I'm married. Such random timing. Well that's the idea my sister gave him, anyway.

It's supposed to snow Thursday (I think it's that day?). As much as I dislike snow, I'm so excited. Maine is so beautiful when covered in fresh snow. Especially before the footprints and while it's still in the trees. Such beauty. I'm not ready to leave.

More

I know, I know...2 posts in one day? What is this, last summer? But there's more that I just keep thinking about and figured, why not share it?

This year was the first time in...a really long time...that I spent Christmas in CA. In fact, my brother has no memories of Christmases with us sisters, because we always spend them here in Maine. But this year, it didn't work out for me to come (silly jury duty). I realized, besides having a white Christmas (which really wouldn't have been that white), what I missed the most is the candles. Many New England houses put one candlestick (read: electric "candlestick") in each window in the front of their house. It's beautiful at night to pass homes decorated this way. This is one piece of New England that will come with me wherever I live in the future.

Kind of like this. But imagine it's dark outside and this is what you see.

Beautiful, isn't it?

On another note, tonight we're going out to dinner as a family and I'm so excited. Time spent with my family is something I treasure, as I'm sure you know if you've read much of my blog. My time with them is very limited, so I want to make each moment special. Then later, since Chynna (our fourth "adopted" sister - she and her dad moved from Kentucky this summer and have been living with us while looking for their own home, and she happens to be the same age as my younger sisters - in fact, born on the same day as Abby) is coming back from visiting the bf in Texas, we're doing our sister secret santa gift exchange. I'm so excited to see what everyone got for each other. 

Also totally different, today I've spent time reading one of my favorite blogs. The writer and her husband (and their baby) always find the coolest places to eat. They eat out all the time. I don't know how they stay so thin! I know I wouldn't if I ate like them. Not that I could afford to. They just find awesome places to eat and always get yummy foods, plus they look good doing it. Kudos to them, I say.

I really am enjoying break. I mentioned in my earlier post today (I'm such a nerd) that I'm not ready for school to start again. Usually near the end of break, I can't wait to get back. This time, I'm semi-dreading it. Not because I won't want to be there - I totally do!! I just don't want to leave here yet. I'm not ready. I'm in Maine until Friday afternoon and it's only Monday (the midpoint of my trip), but it feels like it's coming up way too fast for my liking. Where has my break gone?! It's been so busy and so fun and full of adventures and friends that it's just flown by. Last semester was so tough so letting go of my break won't be easy. But I know that I have a promising semester ahead of me, which will be full of God's grace and His blessings. I'm excited for what's in store. Until then though, I'll enjoy every second of my break.

Some Facts

Fact:


...the way I dress on lazy, stay-at-home-winter-break days is the way I wish I could dress daily (and I bet most people agree).


...my outfit doesn't really match today (but it's okay because my purple puffy vest with the fleece pockets is worth the sacrifice).


...if you were to eat with me in the caf last semester you'd think I always eat healthy, but if you were to see me in my dorm room, you'd think all I eat is junk food.


...I exercise for two reasons: to take care of myself, and so that I can eat more yummy foods.


...I can't WAIT to see my Awana kids or meet with Meredith again.


...seeing friends sounds nice too.


...but, for once, I truly don't want break to end yet.


...my family is made up of the best, most fun, funniest, greatest people I'd ever met (biased or not).


...coming to Maine was the first time I got absolutely no sleep on my red-eye...that's right, me, who is able to sleep anytime, anywhere (which has always made Abs envious).


...staying up into the wee hours of the night talking and laughing with my three sisters after a night of absolutely no sleep was a great use of my time.


...youngest siblings are born for the entertainment of older siblings, and so the older ones can make fun of them.


...when discussing our biting habits as children, Abby piped up with the now-famous "I used to chew on rocks", which was obviously followed by stunned silence.


...my sisters are great at Secret Santas...minus the "secret" part.


...in our family, the parents don't pressure us (my three sisters and I) for grandkids, but the sisters pressure each other for nieces and nephews. And we are in total disagreement of who's going to get married and have kids first.


...sometimes candy just tastes better before lunch.


...you know I'm in a time zone three hours ahead of what I'm used to when I wake up at 9:30am.


...I can't buy music without getting some Lady Antebellum.


...I really want to go to the Lady A concert in LA March 27th.


...I usually like acoustic versions of songs better.


...milk chocolate > dark chocolate. No matter what my friends say. No matter if they call me a boy for it.


...too much dreaming can get you into trouble (emotionally).


...the more layers on my bed the better; even if it's not cold, the added pressure helps me sleep.


...my sister just got a cat (temporarily I think?) and I'm wicked jealous.


...go here, have a listen. Enter the Haggis has great music and they are great live, for anyone interested (CA friends: though they are great live, they don't spend much time out west, unfortunately).


...salty and sweet remains one of my favorite treat combos.


...I'd marry Ben or Jerry if given the opportunity. (such.good.ice cream.)


...to many people use apostrophes wrong. Unless it is used for a contraction or to show possession, don't use it. No more of this "Flower's are pretty" stuff please...sadly, I have seen that cropping up more and more.


...you can't top Italian, Thai, or Mexican food. You just can't.


...Pinterest is spelled like this: P-i-n-t-e-r-e-s-t. It's not P-I-N-T-R-E-S-T. But honestly, who really cares? It's just the grammar nerd in me coming out.


...also, Pinterest is a wonderful website full of many pretties.


...as much as I've loved college, I can't wait to finally have my own classroom to teach in.


...my youngest sister talks to her computer. And her food. And...well, just anything.


...I sing in the shower, and sound great. haha.


...I need to download more free music on iTunes. Or at least check every week to see if there's something good. Because sometimes there is!


...Maine is beautiful and I don't want to leave.

The End of 2011

As it was for many people, 2011 was quite an eventful year for me. It has definitely had its share of excitement, blessings, and challenges. I have learned many things this year, one of the main ones being trust God - He is worthy of your trust, and He is faithful. Of course, that is a lesson I will learn again and again for the rest of my life, but still. I'm working on it.

This year ended well - I was relieved from jury duty and given the opportunity to spend this past week (Tuesday-Sunday) in the Santa Cruz area with Lindsay and her family. We did the usual things - lots of family (+ me) time at their grandparents' house, went to Monterey (a trip which always includes the Dennis the Menace park and Cannery Row), beach trip, the necessary Marianne's-run-after-a-day-at-the-beach, hanging out at the ranch, etc. Of course there were also things unique to this trip (or things at least new to me) - played with the two kittens constantly at Lindsay's aunt and uncle's house (where she and I stayed during the trip), tractor rides at the ranch, a walk at Mount Hermon while the boys played football, shopping in Capitola, playing cards with all the kids (ps. Zach and Jordan had us in hysterics), and many others. New Year's Eve was spent at L's grandparents' house. As midnight approached, it was just the Stoevers and me who made it, and all of their extended family had left or gone to bed. We watched Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (super cute) and  paused to drink Martinelli's at midnight (we had watched the ball drop at 9pm live in NYC). I could write forever about all the things we did during our trip, but for your sake and my own, I won't. Here are some pictures that were taken on the trip (from both my phone and Lindsay's):

 Tues night we had dinner at the Crow's Nest. This is the sunset we saw as we arrived.

Harbor by the Crow's Nest.

 "The Ranch" aka Frank & Laura's, where Linds and I stayed.

 They had kitties!!! This one is Socks. xo. 

(Ps. they made me miss Romeo, whom Zach still

accuses me of killing...which I didn't do.)

We all got to drive a tractor one day...so fun.

 Linds and I at the Dennis the Menace park...we're crazy.

 Cuuuuuutest couple ever. Love them. Lindsay's grandparents.

Spent yesterday (Dec 31st) at the beach in Santa Cruz. It was a gorgeous day. 

This is Abby...we had a lot of fun this trip!! Miss her already.

So that is my trip in a nutshell. More pics might come later, but for now (and maybe forever) this will do!

Other miscellaneous thoughts:

-Read this and this (both from the Desiring God blog and written by Paul Tripp and John Piper, respectively), as you think about the next year. The first contains my philosophy of new year's resolutions, but written more eloquently than I ever could.

-Still working on this. So far, so good. No dramatic changes - I wrote last week in my journal that this probably more of a slow and steady learning process than quick and easy. 

-Still getting ahead for Children's Lit as I mentioned here. I've read Charlotte's Web and The Tales of Beatrix Potter, and I'm currently working on The Giver by Lois Lowry...such an interesting book. Can hardly put it down (except I did to work on my blog, because I haven't posted in a while). I ordered the textbooks for this class too, and as soon as they come in, I'm going to start reading them.
-Currently studying Isaiah. I'll be honest - this book has been a toughie! There is so much I don't understand, and though I've learned a lot, I'm sure I've missed most of what's there. Still, it's been an incredible blessing and it's a great picture of different aspects of God's character.

-This week will be a crazy little week trying to cram everything in (mainly hanging out with friends and family, and getting ready for.....)

-....My trip to Maine which begins in 4 days...I am so ready to be out there!!

-I'm excited to get my Nook Tablet and figure it out.

-Thinking ahead to this semester, wondering what it will be like. Only God knows, and I am SO content and happy about that.
-Can't wait to see Ansley, Justin, Ellyse, and Silas (my Awana kids) again!

-God is so good. Today I was reminded of the importance of preaching the gospel to myself each day. Such a crucial part of the Christian life.

-Looking forward to seeing what 2012 holds. May God be glorified in all that I do!